"To leather, to dildos..."
Written @ 6:27 a.m. on January 24, 2006
Alright, this isn't a real update...it's just proof that I am indeed alive and kicking. Actually, more like getting my butt kicked: by end of the semester grades, by the fact that they completely switched around science classes so I had to redo my lesson plans on the fly last weekend, and by the fact that my astronomy class started and while it's very interesting, it's also a lot of work and our first test is next week. I've also spent the last two weekends on the road going to UCSB basketball games. At any rate, this little bit of insanity has been sitting on my computer for about a month. Thought I'd entertain y'all with it.
Remember a while back I said that when Lisa and I get on messenger things can get pretty goofy and obscene? This is mild compared to some of our conversations, but it was such a fun one that I decided to share it with all of you!
Lisa: I earned $75 worth of gift certificates to amazon.com because I put my Dr.'s surgery fees on my Amazon visa Me: added bonus Lisa: hmmmm rabbit vibrator is only $39.99... Merry Christmas to me Me: on Amazon? Me: or are you shopping somewhere else now Lisa: yup Me: on Amazon?!?!? Me: I've never been to THAT page Lisa: link #1 Me: NOW I'm convinced I've seen it all Me: I never knew they had sex toys on Amazon Lisa: they hooked up with drugstore.com and they have them Lisa: oh wow link #2 Me: do I want to click that Me: I have virginal eyes, you know Lisa: oh yeah (sarcastic emoticon) Me:Pleasure for Morning, Noon and Night Me: you can bring one to work with you Me: a little lunch time diversion Lisa: that's what I thought Me: oh wait, look at the link on the right Me: you can add it to your wedding registry Lisa: considering my mom keeps asking where my husband is...she obviously knows something I don't Me: you can bring the vibe to her Me: here he is Lisa: oh she'd be so confused Me: his name is BOB (battery operated boyfriend) Me: you know those little tuxedos they make for beer bottles...bet it would fit BOB Lisa: hee hee Me: tuxedo BOB Lisa: these have suction cups link #3 Lisa: here's another great line Lisa:A quiet, powerful, multispeed, wearable personal vibrator that can be worn with bands or as a tongue piercing. Me: link, please Lisa: link #4 Me:Enjoy an exclusive 30-day satisfaction guarantee when you purchase from Wild In Secret Me: and if you don't like it and send it back Me: what exactly do they do with it? Lisa: I don't want to know Lisa: the name cracks me up link #5 Me: oh Me: my Me: goodness Lisa: the label info is priceless Lisa: it's so nice that clean-up is a snap Me: I'm sorry Me: now I have mental images of a wall Me: and you Me: that do not belong in my head Me: ever Lisa: oh no here's another one Lisa: link#6 Me: happy birthday? Lisa: enlarge the pic for all the versions Me: I did Me: Hey, I didn't see THAT in my birthday box this year Lisa: sorry I didn't know it was needed Me:��to leather, to dildos�� Lisa: I thought the bubble wrap was enough Me: I'd have jumped on the table at PF Cheng�s with the dildo and the bubble wrap Lisa: you already have the handcuffs Me: oh, yeah, forgot about that Me: I do Me: and they're fuzzy Lisa: you�re missing the lawn chair Me: oh, I am already afraid of next year's birthday package Lisa: you should be Me: or, I see a new Halloween costume Me: me, bubble wrap, handcuffs, and a lawn chair Me: the boys are planning to be Mark and Roger for Halloween Me: I'd fit right in Lisa: you'd never be able to wear it to school Me: that's ok Me: it'll go over well at the playgroup Halloween party, I'm sure Lisa: I'll take Maureen's cat suit Lisa: or maybe I should be Pussy Galore Me: your students would never get it Me: you could totally get away with it Lisa: no but I'd be amused Lisa: so here's my Amazon list Me: uh oh Lisa: rabbit habit Lisa: Wicked: the life and times of the wicked witch of the west Me: nice pair Me: wait, the novel Me: from before the play? Lisa: Wicked: the grimmerie, behind the scenes look at the hit musical Lisa: yup the play is based on the novel Me: I know�I have the novel Me: you can still buy it Me: or you can borrow mine Lisa: hmmm maybe I'll just borrow yours Me: more money for vibes that way Me: although now I have this mental image Me: of the wicked witch and a vibe Me: bad bad bad mental image Me: The Wizard of Oz will never be the same for me now Lisa: hee hee